Fully-Remote Work Pays Today, but Future Trade-offs Risk Career Advancement & Meaningful Work Friendships
Some of my closest friendships were initially formed at the workplace, working in teams with other people. My abilities, perspective and early career benefitted from working in-person with different managers, clients, colleagues and suppliers. Back then, we didn’t consider this a career positioning strategy; that’s just what work was. Today, with fully-remote work a real possibility, young professionals need to be more mindful about the shape of their early career.
When I began full-time work in 1985, it was taken for granted that daytime work would be done in-person with other colleagues, whether in the office or on the road. I also saw how one colleague’s career progression stalled when she transitioned to fully remote work away from the teams in the 1990’s. While her skills were good, it was a case of “out of sight, out of mind.” When new opportunities arose, the team members who were visibly available were more likely to be drafted.
Recently, one of my friends (who was a former work colleague) shared that her daughter and her fiance, who each have four years’ experience working fully-remote, never want or intend to work in-person. From their standpoint, fully-remote work is ideal. And, of course, for some segments of workers, working fully-remote may be ideal. For others, they will likely lose out on promotions and friendships by choosing to only work remote. It’s important to mindfully consider these tradeoffs when planning your career positioning strategy.
Based on my experiences working with leaders across industries in the Los Angeles area, only about 10-15% thrived in the fully-remote COVID environment, while the vast majority are more satisfied either fully in-person or hybrid (some time in person and some time remote).
Career Positioning Strategy: RTO Woes
Recently, there has been a lot of negative press about mandatory return to office (RTO) at large employers like Amazon (five days a week as of January 2025 for 350,000 employees), AT&T (also five days a week as of January 2025) and JP Morgan. The litany of complaints includes:
- Lack of preparation for the return to office, resulting in a lack of desks and crowding
- Lack of parking
- Excessive noise (e.g., loud Zoom meetings)
- WIFI problems
- Health concerns.
- Others note that no one on their team is in the same office, so that in person collaboration is not possible.
From recent reporting, it seems returning workers see only unpleasant and inconvenient downsides to working in-person, and that there is little to no interest in having an open mind to any benefits or upside from working in person. Without an open mind, or an interest in developing productive in-person relationships, the hard core in-person refusniks are pretty much guaranteed not to experience anything positive. They may also find that their careers are sidetracked compared to colleagues who are able to thrive working in-person, who look for the benefits.
This all made me wonder what recent research says about the different groups and their expectations.
Career Positioning Strategy:
Increasingly, Young Workers Miss Out on Close Friendships at Work
For full-time workers, more than 50% of their waking hours during the week are spent at work. And, friendships at work contribute to satisfaction with work, feeling connected and valued, and even a sense of meaning. For instance, 62% of workers with close office friends report feeling very satisfied or completely satisfied with their job. This compares with 58% who have office friends but no close friends, dropping all the way down to 37% satisfaction among those who do not have friends at work.
Similarly, among those who have a close office friend, 45% report feeling excited and engaged with their work every day or nearly every day, contrasted to 19% of those with no office friends.
Just 20% of workers under age 35 have a close friend at work. This is down from 25% in 2019. The starting point may be to form some casual friendships at work, as this is associated with more satisfaction than having no friends. A different study found that 51% of workers over age 51 have a friend at work, compared to 30% of those under age 30.
Building friendships takes time. By one estimate, it takes 200+ hours of social time together to develop a close friendship and 50 hours to move from acquaintance to casual friend.
Just working together “doesn’t count as much,” as Professor Hall, who led this research, says:
“We have to put that time in…You can’t snap your fingers and make a friend. Maintaining close relationships is the most important work we do in our lives — most people on their deathbeds agree.”
Career Positioning Strategy:
Working In-Person is a Lifehack for Easily Making Friends
In my experience, when working together in-person, developing friendships at work (putting in the hours) was relatively straightforward by grabbing coffee or tea on a break, getting lunch together or socializing after work hours. Working collaboratively also contributed to the closer relationships, as together we found out who could be trusted when a deadline loomed. That’s a career positioning strategy anyone can implement today.
Sadly,, remote workers have 33% fewer friendships according to one source. Kelli Mason, chief operating officer at JobSage, says:
“Our survey of 1,200 remote workers found that the shift to full-time remote work is impacting social interactions among co-workers for many American workers…Younger generations seem most impacted by this shift with millennials (39%) and Gen Z (21%) reporting the highest percentages of demographics without friends in a remote office setting.”
Some remote workers hired during the pandemic necessarily did not meet their colleagues in person. And for most remote workers, casual “water cooler” conversations are not possible or very difficult. Daily check-ins are touted as a best practice for remote workers, leading to more connection, but importantly, this connection is likely only with the immediate work group, not others in the broader organization.
A different study found that 72% of workers ages 45 to 54 have friends they would stay in touch with, compared with 55% of workers ages 18 to 24.
To me, all of this adds up to a younger cohort of workers who are less socially connected at work, working in more isolated work groups, with less perspective and connection on their broader work environment. For these workers who have never experienced the benefits of in-person work, they are skeptical and may not be open to considering these benefits, and/or hyper-critical when the in-person workplace fails to immediately deliver on their expectations. Long-term, if they maintain this mindset, they will need to form friendships exclusively in their non-working hours, and this will tend to put more pressure on those friendships. Additionally, it’s my opinion that their careers will suffer, as their negative in-person mindset holds them back compared to with other cohorts who are more open minded.
Career Positioning Strategy:
Remote Workers Face Slower Career ProgressionCompared to In-Person and Hybrid Colleagues
A 2023 study by Live Data Technologies found that 5.6% of in-office workers received promotions, compared with 3.9% who worked fully-remote. While the “good news” is that hybrid workers were promoted at the same rate as the in-office workers, the same study found:
“Nearly 90% of chief executives (1,325) who were surveyed said that when it comes to favorable assignments, raises or promotions, they are more likely to reward employees who make an effort to come to the office.”
Another study found less feedback for remote workers, i.e., software engineers who worked in the same office received 22% more feedback on their code than those who didn’t share an office.
There is a strong remote-worker preference for some employees, with 67% of remote workers saying they would pass on a promotion to continue working remotely, and 49% said they’d take a 10-20% pay cut.
Return to Work:
Early Data Among Young Workers
From Deloitte’s worldwide study in 2024, there is a mixed experience among young workers for the return to work.
Positives for Gen Z workers include:
- Feeling more engaged and connected with my organization and colleagues (26%)
- Noticing increased collaboration and social interaction with work colleagues (24%)
- Prefer dynamics of face-to-face communication at work (21%)
- Having better routine and structure at work (25%)
Negatives for Gen Z workers include:
- Negatively impacted in a financial sense (21%)
- Decreased productivity (18%)
- Decreased mental well-being and increased stress (16%)
- Negatively impacted caregiving ability (14%)
Career Positioning Strategy for In-Person Work
As a reminder, the classic positioning strategy format is:
- To target [specific audience],
- For [defined] frame of reference,
- Brand X is the [functional/emotional] point of differentiation
- Because [attributes] reasons to believe
We can apply positioning strategy to career planning, like so.
To: young workers who are interested to broaden their skills, advance their careers and form meaningful friendships at work who are also willing to invest time to do so with an “open mind”
For: your working life
Working in-person full or part time is the best way to develop broader skills, make meaningful friendships and advance your career
Because: you will receive better development if you seek it from a range of people at work. Humans are hard-wired to bias to those they know and see, and your work hours will be more meaningful if you have friendships.
Of course, there will be younger workers who thrive in fully remote, experience accelerated careers and who develop casual work friendships. For those who still prefer remote work and have a closed mindset to any benefits to in-person work, then they should accept the tradeoffs and seek a workplace that celebrates their style.
My experience with Los Angeles professionals and these studies together suggest that these “in-person refusniks” are a minority, however. If I were advising a young professional, I’d strongly suggest working at least hybrid if not full-time in-person. Exceptions may be noted, for instance in companies built for remote work, and or certain tech jobs with long-established tech traditions.
I’d also suggest taking the extra step to get to know colleagues, to form friendships, and avoid behaving transactionally. That effort will require time invested, to be sure, but it’s a time investment that’s well worth it, in my opinion.
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